concealing
concealing is the hardest part. concealing feelings, concealing thoughts. i can’t even share these thoughts with anyone. well i have done so. one. but i was advised to conceal it too. said it wouldn’t look good. said it wouldn’t be proper. said that i should not encourage these types of feelings. i wonder what if i defy everyone. what if. what if. it’s gonna be a risk i’d take if i choose to follow my mind and heart. not to mention the impact and gravity of it all.
killing these feelings would also mean killing my senses. well in that case, i’d say i’m better off being numb. numb to all senses because i had to conceal. till someone else worthy comes along, i’ll have to keep these feelings on my own. i’m starting to even forget what it is. i guess i’m succeeding. i hope so.
till then, i’ll keep concealing. concealing and forgetting…
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